A Father’s Bond with His Newborn Is Just as Important as a Mother’s Bond

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Dr Saadia: Well, today I have the pleasure of introducing Kevin, who's usually introducing me. Today we have a very fascinating topic and we're going to talk about Kevin becoming a new father and how, even before his daughter has teeth, he is positively affecting the mouth. Kevin?

Kevin Kowalke: Well, thanks for having me Dr. Saadia. I have to tell you, I've been really excited for this moment after you and I had an initial conversation about how this could be a really interesting topic for people to listen to with regards to the experience that I'm having as a brand-new first-time father. We have this beautiful little angel of a girl, Miss Addison Grace, who has been really incredible and I believe, and I know we'll talk about this today, I believe a lot of it has to do with the positive energy and the approach that the majority, my wife Julie has taken, as well as myself. I'm excited to share with everyone.

Dr Saadia: I just love hearing when you light up talking about Julie and about Addison. One of the reasons I wanted to have this podcast was really share it with the world because I don't believe there is enough emphasis on the father's role, especially the new father. Everybody talks about the mother, but the father plays a very, very important role. I wanted to talk about it because you talk about it with such passion. Can you talk a little bit about how your role has changed from just being a father who's expecting to a father who's got a role now?

Kevin Kowalke: Yeah. Absolutely. I appreciate you giving me some latitude here to just share. I'll preface it by saying leading up to the birth of Addison, I really had no idea what to expect and really what my role would ultimately be. Leading up to the moment that she was born, I did my best to really keep my wife Julie happy, to try and serve her and make her as comfortable as possible, do as many things as I could based on the time that I had, and to be really be present with her in the relationship that we have as husband and wife because I believe that the interaction that we would have, the love that we would share together, would ultimately be transferred to Addison in the womb because I believe that Julie's approach to the pregnancy, which was amazing, like she was Superwoman, okay?

She never got frustrated. She was sick for the first trimester like a lot of women are, but she never complained about it and she always just looked at it and embraced the moment of being pregnant, and really was forecasting and looking into the future of what it would be like to be Mom and really appreciating all those moments during the pregnancy.

I really took on the role of, and this was very easy for me because, a lot of people make fun of me, but I love doing laundry. I love doing cleaning. I enjoy cooking. My wife kind of hit the lottery with me, and made it a lot easier because that was a lot of less things for her to do that I believe a lot of women take on in the role of the household. Even with myself being the main wage earner within the family, I still enjoy doing that and find time to be able to do all those things. That translated into the continued role that I play now and Addison, at the time of us having this conversation, had just turned five months last week. I believe that that has really helped to allow Julie to focus on these super influential first 12 months of Addison's life to be a mom and to give love and all of that.

I realize that I'm in a role where Addison really needs Mom and wants Mom, and that I take whatever time I get with her and I don't take it personal when she's really fussy and then when Mom gets her she's fine, because I recognize, that at least my belief, is during these early months of development that she needs the love and nurturing of Mom. I've really tried to, with my role, just take on as many responsibilities as I possibly can so that Julie could focus our time and attention on Addison.

Dr Saadia: What you just said was remarkable. If new fathers, once hearing this, can really listen to the words that you said, they're so simple. The role that you described as being a new father, you said be present. Be loving. Be supportive and just allow the mother and the child to have that love and support around them. I mean that's just magical. It's so simple, yet magical.

Kevin Kowalke: Yeah, and the thing of it is that I get frustrated too and Addison has her moments, although I do believe we hit the lottery with her. She's been a really amazing baby, although I do give credit to Julie with regards to her demeanor leading up to the pregnancy, after the pregnancy, as to why she's happy, and she laughs, and she smiles, and she's super engaging and attentive. To me, I give Julie a lot of credit because she reads a ton and really tries to stay up with where Addison should be development-wise month, after month, after month so that we feel like we're supporting her in the way that we can as new parents. She's been really ahead of everything that some experts are saying we should expect.

Again, I really tie that to I believe we're giving Addison the environment to be able to thrive, and I also believe that she's getting the time, the attention, the energy, the love that is really necessary to allow her to be very happy, and we believe healthy as well.

Dr Saadia:  Now I'm really, really interested even more because everything you have shared, were you sitting on my shoulder when I attended this functional medicine conference Kevin? Because one of the quotes I need to share is we don't need to be at the mercy of our genes. We have the freedom, and we can choose to be masters of our genes and our destiny, and that's the field of epigenetics. This is what functional medicine is actually speaking about now, what you just shared, and people don't realize that medicine is not just about what we put into our mouths, it's about what we surround ourselves with also. All the supportive love and allowing that you're talking about, just hearing that I feel like I can breathe better now. You know?

If I'm just listening to this, I can imagine how Julie, who's an absolutely wonderful mother and I've seen her through the pregnancy, and she's amazing, and to have that support that you just described around it, of course you're giving everything you can for Miss Addison Grace, what a beautiful name, to thrive, not just survive. That is so vital. This is the where we're at right now. Go ahead.

Kevin Kowalke: I'll share a quick story with you, after you said that quote, which I think is very profound, and I think this will support it. After I had seen you most recently, when I got back to Florida I actually got really sick. I was sick for about nine days or so and it was a viral deal. Unfortunately Julie got sick too, but she got sick much worse than I. She was sick for two weeks, had this unbearable cough that literally was present 24 hours a day. Here's little Miss Addison, who has to deal with Mom and Dad sick literally at the same time, and this little girl never ever got sick from what we believe, right? Because she showed no sign, no fevers, no nothing. I believe that has to do with Julie made the decision, and I supported it of course, that she would breast-feed. I call that liquid gold and I believe that that has a really big impact on the immune system of a developing child, from everything that I've read about.

We still did everything that we could to make sure we were giving Addison what she needed around the love and the energy and the time and attention, even though we were just both not well, and that little girl got through it without ever once showing any kind of signs of catching anything from it. Could I be wrong? Of course, but I believe that there's something to that that has allowed her to develop a pretty powerful immune system very early on.

Dr Saadia: You know, you're so right about that. Thank you for putting it like that, because you just, as medical people we sometimes get lost in oh, there is [inaudible 00:10:21] evidence and data out there. What you just described is so real. You said the two adults that were around this beautiful new young baby were both ill at different times, and you just described that she did not get sick. You protected her. That is amazing, because there's no way of protecting her against viruses. Viruses are just everywhere, but you helped her through supporting her immune system just by good, good vibes. That's amazing.

Kevin Kowalke: We hope that that had something to do with it because we're going to continue on that path.

Dr Saadia: Absolutely, and breast-feeding, as you know we've talked about multiple times the help of the breast-feeding, and you summed it up. It's liquid gold and the microbiomes, which we've talked about briefly, and now it's widely accepted we're mostly microbiomes and we can influence our microbiomes not just through the food that we eat, because that's what we always focus on, that it comes from nourishment, but it's also the thoughts and the emotions. People forget that's also nourishment.

Kevin Kowalke: Yeah, and another thing I'd like to point out that I believe ties into what we're focusing on right now is because of our approach with her, and most specifically Julie, Addison very early on, and I have shared this with you before Dr. Saadia, she got into her own rhythm and pattern of sleeping, eating, and she started sleeping through the night very early on. I also believe that that played a role with regards to her being able to fight off whatever potential illness that she could have gotten from us, because let's face it, we were with her 24 hours a day and we could only wash our hands so much and try to avoid having any kind of the cough be in the area that she is.

I think that that really played a part in it too, and again, I give credit to Julie with regards to her calmness and her patience and how much that she just poured her love into that little girl. I would do what I could too, of course, when I had the time with her but I think that may have had something to do with it as well is she gets a lot of really good rest.

Dr Saadia: Again, I love it when you bring that [inaudible 00:13:07] and really give you some of the current medical and dental views on this because simply put, sleep is when the brain detoxifies, when the body detoxifies. What you just said, good sleep, restful sleep is allowing the body, and Miss Addison's body's smart, her microbiomes are probably at a much higher level than anyone of us. She's already figured this part out and she's like, "I'm going to sleep, so I'm going to fight all this off." A good night's sleep, a good night's rest, and you've already established that in her. You and Julie have together created this, of course through God's mercy, but this beautiful little being, which you're just nurturing this plant and she's like, "Oh, I'm growing in a happy way." That's what it's about. That's magical. I love it. Tell me more.

Kevin Kowalke: Well, I mean I could go on. It has been a really wonderful experience for me. As you know, I'm an older first-time father. I'm 44 years old. Julie, at the time of, well she's still 35, but at the time of Addison's birth she was 35 as well at that moment. Another thing I think that was really helpful for us-

Dr Saadia: Can I just interject here?

Kevin Kowalke: Oh, sure.

Dr Saadia: I'm just going to interject something, because you stumbled on this a couple of times. I'm just going to clarify it for you and the listeners. Julie's not changing from 35, okay? She is allowed to remain 35 for a number of different birthdays, so let's get that straight.

Kevin Kowalke: I will definitely keep that in mind Dr.

Dr Saadia: Yes, so there's no confusion around there.

Kevin Kowalke: Okay.

Dr Saadia: Go ahead. Continue.

Kevin Kowalke: I just made a note of that.

Dr Saadia: Thank you. Thank you. I just had to kind of clarify that, but please yes, continue.

Kevin Kowalke: Yeah, so the point that I wanted to make about that, which I believe is relevant and important for two reasons. Number one, is we've been through a lot more of life experiences and we've also been able to experience life in a voluntary way that has been very pleasing for us. We both have traveled a lot and we've just done a lot of things over the course of our life where literally if we did nothing else we could say we've lived a lifetime. So because of that, I believe we have a little bit more wisdom. I believe we have a little bit more patience. I believe we have a much different and more valuable perspective on our roles as parents, as providers, as givers of love to Addison.

For those people who are in a similar situation as us with regards to that age, is I would say rely on instinctually the things that you have been through before in the past and rely on your gut, because I believe that that's where a lot of our wisdom lies will. For those who are listening who are younger, who have not had as many life experiences, I would say to those individuals is if there's any piece of advice that I could give as a new father, so I'm speaking to the men out there, is do everything that you can to practice patience, patience with your wife or significant other, patience with your child, and patience for yourself. Don't allow outside circumstances to get you riled up, to get you super frustrated, because realize that listen, these things are happening.

As men, as fathers, as leaders of the household, leaders of this little child, it's important to remain calm and to have a clear mind with regards to, "Okay, what can I do to improve this situation or at least maintain it so it doesn't get any worse?" I think as younger individuals who are having children, that can be a very challenging thing just based upon a lot of work that I've done with the younger adults in entrepreneurship and mentoring and those kind of things. I believe that that's translated as well into roles as parents.

I wanted to share that because I believe that some of the problems I've witnessed people having with their children is I think that they're just creating such a tense and stressful environment that the baby is taking that on, and thus responding to that and acting in a way that the parents probably wish was the exact opposite. Hopefully people who are listening can really take that and take a step back and say, "Okay, how can I create something very similar?"

Dr Saadia: It's fascinating, everything you said. I'm going to kind of turn it in my perspective just a little, because obviously being a pediatric dentist and being very much involved in the mouth, I can tie everything you said. You said go with your gut, and one of the things that's talked about right now is heal the gut. I know you meant it more in emotional perspective, but I'm just trying to put the two parallels together. When you go with your gut, you're actually healing your gut and now you're saying that, you know you said the gut and then you said that will heal, and now they're finding linkages between when you heal the actual physical gut, you're actually healing the brain.

Kevin Kowalke: That's really amazing.

Dr Saadia: You just said go with your gut, be supportive. These are just such powerful emotions that you have just described. If people can really listen and absorb that, and feel it, it's so simple the formula you have just laid out.

Kevin Kowalke: Yeah, and the other thing I'd like to add to that Dr. is I know that I primarily have been focusing on Addison and how all of this experience I believe has benefited her. Well I will tell you, Julie and I have already had a very wonderful relationship and marriage, and she's my best friend without a doubt, but it has strengthened our relationship in a much different way than we ever could have experienced without a child and without our approach to how we're parenting this child and how we love and support each other.

Even as much as I'd go to the end of the earth for Julie, I would now go to the end of the second earth for her because I realize how much more valuable and amazing that she is as I've now witnessed for five months her being a mother to Miss Addison. I mean it has been a delight for me to just sit back and observe, which I do a lot. I'm a very observant person. In fact, I tend to actually just sit and be quiet and take a lot of things in, in many different situations in life, and it has just been, it has brought a lot of joy and happiness to me to be able to see Julie in her glory of being a mother, of loving on this little girl, and of being a really amazing wife to me during a very committed, demanding time in her life of being a mother who breast-feeds her child.

Dr Saadia: Wow. Wow. What you just said is so powerful. You said as a father, as a leader of the family unit, because you didn't emphasize yourself, you said you're the leader of the family unit and you have allowed and supported lovingly the mother to be at her highest so that the child can be at their highest. Such a beautiful, just so beautiful, so powerful, and so simple rule for fatherhood.

Kevin Kowalke: Yeah, obviously I had no idea what I was getting into and whether my approach would be at its best, but I'm a man of faith and so I pray a lot about it, and I just ask God for a lot of guidance and wisdom with regards to what to do, which I believe is again my gut as we talk about it. The other thing you might find funny is, because I do believe that I am the head of the household, I am the leader of the family, and I think Julie very much appreciates that because we both have a very similar belief with regards to our roles in the family unit. The thing that I say to Julie though is I say, "Well, I might be the leader of this family but you're the CEO of Addison, and so I listen to you." We kind of joke and laugh about it, but you know what? I'll tell you, I have witnessed, and you know Julie, she's a strong woman, okay?

Dr Saadia: I love Julie. She's wonderful.

Kevin Kowalke: Yeah, but to see just her decisiveness and her decision-making and the level of confidence that she has in small, large decisions about her, it's just been, it's been just great to watch it and she really has taken on that role. I know it sounds a little bit silly, but she's really embraced that and I believe she understands what I mean when I say that to her and she knows that I support her on it and that she'll come to me if she feels like she can use my opinion or whatever the case would be with regards to a decision for her, but I would say 99 out of 100 times she's the one directing what's happening with Addison. Just from what we've already talked about today, she's doing a really amazing job at it.

Dr Saadia: Wow. Yeah. I know Julie and I love Julie, and Julie is a very strong person. It's fascinating how you just said you're actually supporting Julie to be even stronger, which for you, it's natural and that's the right thing. I want people who are listening to really understand what it takes for a father to support the mother who's a very strong person because everybody knows my personality is a little on the strong side. Sometimes it can be a little scary, so I loved how you said, I can guess that, but I love how you said supporting Julie, allowing her, and just being, saying, "Hey, this is the right thing to do."

You said it so powerfully. That is what a true leader of the family and what a family man is all about. I truly appreciate that because that is so powerful. Being a woman myself and looking back at what played a great role in my life, of course you know I don't want to, this is an interview about you and the role of the father, but I do want to interject a little bit because I really see a lot of women of course, and women professionals, and I see the difference when they've had a great father figure in their life and they've been fortunate enough to have that person to say, "You know what? I support you. I believe in you and I'm behind you."

It doesn't go away just because you become a mother, you know? That presence is still needed and that's what you're describing, being a man of faith and how being a man who has a beautiful family, and how you're saying so passionately about raising a beautiful young lady, and then I can tie it back to the mouth and the gut because guys, it's so simple. There's certain basic principles that don't go away. It's the law and order of nature. The microbiomes, our gut microbiomes recognize it when we speak like this. I mean I'm already feeling much more relaxed than when I started out. Today's my first time interviewing someone and of all people I have to interview the person who interviews me and moderates me. My goodness. I was like a little, my gut was kind of going around a little, but this is so powerful and I was like, "I have to do this because people don't ... "

I mean I was blessed to have this opportunity when you were speaking with me and I was like we've got to talk about this because a lot of times when I'm seeing parents in my office, especially new parents, a lot of times I see the fathers. They don't know what their role is because everybody has a different journey, everybody has a different path, but you've just given very basic simple things. Be supportive. Be loving. Be the leader, allow. You've just given very clear cut instructions for fatherhood.

Kevin Kowalke: Yeah, and thank you for saying that. And by the way, you're doing a great job, which I knew that you would. I'd like to add two more things to what you were just summarizing there. The first one is I think it's important for a man, because let's face it, society tells us we need to be strong and this, that, and the other, and the whole deal. I think it's important as a husband, as a father, is to be compassionate and not take things very personal.

As an example, Julie has her moments, right? Like if Addison's just having a little bit of a day, you know she's teething now, and so although I think her teething experience has been much less than most of the experiences I've heard from other parents she'll still have a little bit of a ... and so Julie gets a little riled up and she gets exhausted, and she might say something to me in a little bit of a snappy way and I don't take it personal. I don't think she's being mean to me or yelling at me or whatever the case might be. I just realize that she's in the moment and she's doing the hard part dealing with Addison during a difficult time because she's the one that Addison really goes to, right now, for that nurturing and that safe place. I say guys, don't take it personal. Don't create something that isn't there, that doesn't exist, and you'll have less disagreements, arguments, even potentially fights with your spouse if you're willing to do that.

The second thing is, going back to the leadership role of the family unit, and I can't remember the gentleman who wrote the blog post and I can't even remember really now who sent this to me, but I read something very powerful literally I think it was about six weeks before Addison was born where it was this gentleman talking about, he was on his third child, and he as well at the time of writing this was about to have the third child and he says, "Okay, looking back after the first two, what would I tell myself as a father of having a third child? What is my role and responsibility?" He sums it up in such a powerful way that made me really go into deep thought about it, is he says, "The entire reason for my existence is to prepare this child to leave me one day."

I was like holy smokes. I didn't even look at it that way, and it was, I mean even still today, like I think about that literally every day because I realize that is my role for her. I'm the rock. I'm the foundation. I'm the one that she's going to come to in the most difficult moments because I am the male, the father, the leader. What am I doing every day, even in these very early developmental moments for her, to prepare her to leave me confidently and to be able to go out into life and have an impact on other people that I believe she can have?

I wanted to share that too because I believe that if us as men think about that statement, I believe it'll change all of our of our perspectives with regards to what our roles truly are.

Dr Saadia: Wow. That was, again, amazing. There's a quote that comes to my mind that I really need to share, and we'll have to modify it because it's written, "Every father should remember that one day his son will follow his example instead of his advice."

Kevin Kowalke:I love that.

Dr Saadia: Every father should remember that at one day his daughter will also follow his example instead of his advice.

Kevin Kowalke: That's very powerful.

Dr Saadia: Yeah. How do you allow, how do you give the tools to your daughter to let her know that she's going to follow his example, but she's a woman? That's what you're teaching her by allowing Julie to be the leader and be all that she can because then Miss Addison grows up seeing a strong mother and a strong father, and still will follow your examples.

Kevin Kowalke: I really like that Dr. and I appreciate you saying that because I believe that to be true, just in life in general, but most specifically I would agree 100% and that's how we live our lives anyways. We believe in being kind to people and respectful, and we think all good things will come from that. That was really from my grandfather who was very much like a father to me, and he says, "If you go through life and you will always be willing to be kind to others, good things will happen to you." I will do my best to pass on those words of wisdom and the legacy that my grandfather has had on myself as well as many others so that Addison has the best opportunity to be in that same role in life later on where she can be very happy and pleased with the role models that she was able to grow up with.

Dr Saadia: I already see that. Miss Addison's going to do fantastic. You're giving her all the tools and the tips and the tools, and she's going to have all the techniques, and she's going to be one fine young lady.

Kevin Kowalke: Thank you.

Dr Saadia: I can't wait to see her as she grows up. We're not going to forget about the healthy microbiome though, so share with me as a new father who's doing all this, share with me what you're doing for her home care routine for her oral hygiene, because I know she's getting teeth as you said.

Kevin Kowalke: Yes. As you know, you are going to be our preferred choice, number one in Addison's life with regards to making sure that we're doing everything possible to give her the opportunity to have a very healthy mouth because I believe like you, and that's why we get along so well, that the mouth does dictate ultimately what the body looks like. I'm following all the advice that you've given through, and I've learned so much through all the podcasts that we've done together and the time that we've spent with regards to the power of breast-feeding and things that we're supposed to be looking for to make sure she doesn't have tongue-ties and lip-ties anything of that nature.

We're going to do everything in our power to make sure that when she starts to transition, which we believe we're going to do that around the six-month timeframe where we give her whole foods that are very nourishing, healthy fats, like those kind of things as well as we're going to really transition her into water, like you've described, so then that way we're not feeding her juice and those kind of things, which ultimately lead to the potential of poor oral health, which we don't want to have that play a role in her life. We want to give her a platform where she doesn't have to get back to a state of health. We're going to do everything that we can to try to make sure that we have already established a level and a foundation, a solid foundation of a healthy mouth.

I'm just going to follow all the tips and the steps that you've laid out for everybody and do my best, and then come to you for advice if I'm uncertain or not sure what to do because I know you'll direct me in the right way, so that Julie and I both believe in that 100% and that we've appreciated all of the wisdom that you've shared with us so that we can give her a really good platform for success when it comes to her teeth and her oral health.

Dr Saadia: I can't wait to have Miss Addison. She's one of my VIP patients and we're going to nurture this young lady, and we have enough information now, and that's what's fascinating. The amount of information and knowledge that's out there right now can safely allow us to nurture a young person into wellness instead of worrying about, because right now we have a serious epidemic in this country on our hands. We have chronically ill children that we're trying to get well, but now in Miss Addison's generation and with people like yourself and Julie, and the knowledge that's out there, we can allow, and we can create an environment where these children grow up well and not have to worry about what if a chronic illness, because if you put in the right building blocks of the food, the nourishment, the emotions, the support, you're allowing this being, this beautiful being to grow in a healthy way, healthy mouth, healthy gut, healthy brain, healthy attitude. That's the beauty of what you have right now.

Kevin Kowalke: Yeah. Thank you, and we're very excited. We're trying to also be very mindful and learn from the past mistakes of others. I don't mean to be harsh there, but I think there were a lot of bad decisions that have been made with regards to how children are raised, whether it be a convenience thing or we're so busy in life that we're shortchanging the approach that we're taking with our children with regards to making sure that they're nourished in a proper fashion.

Just as an example, Julie and I have made a commitment even before Addison was born to simplify our life and not just have it be filled and live this craziness of everybody wearing this badge of honor of like, "Oh, I'm so busy. I've got so many things going on." Well, we live the exact opposite life. We try to have less things going on and have flexibility and opportunity to be able to do whatever comes naturally in the moment rather than this high paced, crazy, scheduled, all these different kind of things going on. We want life to evolve and so I appreciate you sharing all of that and again, we've tried to learn from what's happened before and figure out how can we do it differently so we get a different outcome.

Dr Saadia: I love it. This is such a powerful podcast and there's so much information that you have really shared, and wisdom you've shared Kevin here. Can you summarize just in three tips what you, if someone were to, the Cliff Notes version student who wants to listen to the podcast, can they have three tips as a new father? Because everybody wants a hack these days, so let's give them a new father hack. If you want to do five, that's fine too. I think I a hack's [crosstalk 00:39:33].

Kevin Kowalke: Okay. I'll do my best. Number one-

Dr Saadia: You're doing fantastic.

Kevin Kowalke: Number one, without question, is have patience. You're going through an entirely brand-new experience. There is no roadmap. Every child is unique and so no matter what has been done before you and as much reading as you can do, you're still going to have to be able to adapt so practice patience. It will serve you well as a father so that you don't create any kind of sicknesses or anxiety or more stress than you already have in life, so practice patience.

Number two, do anything and everything that you can to support the mother of your child. What I mean by that is, I don't think women are out there to try and take advantage of a situation, so ask. Say, "What can I do to help you?" and let the mother dictate that to you, and then do everything that you can, and do things behind the scenes so she doesn't even realize it's happening and all of a sudden boom, it's done, and she'll love you even more. That would be the second thing is support the mother of your child in whatever way possible.

The third thing, which we really didn't talk about but I believe is really, really important, is that it's important for you as a father to take time for yourself in reflection about how are things going. Is there anything that you need to change with regards to your attitude, your approach, the time that you spend with your child? Because I think that's another thing that can happen is that we get so wrapped up in what's going on and life that we forget to spend time for ourselves, and really that's advice for women and mothers as well. If you're willing to do that, and I do this on a daily basis, I'm a big self reflector, is I believe you'll find that you'll have less anxiety, you'll have less stress, you'll be able to make adjustments to your approach to being a father in real time that will have a real impact on your child, especially during these very early development years.

Those would be the three, the top three things that I would say and then like a number one all-encompassing one is to give the love that you have, that exists within your heart and your soul, give that to your child and to the mother of your child as often and in a way that they can feel it and experience it, because I just believe without a shadow of a doubt that that truly has an impact with regards to what life is like, what your relationship is like with your significant other, spouse, and what you will be preparing your son or daughter for as they grow up.

Dr Saadia: Wow. Thank you Kevin. This is like one of my ... This is one of my most favorite podcasts and if people don't listen to anything but they listen to this, they would get a wealth of information and that could just transform so many lives out there. I love your advice. I'm going to just recap it and I want to make sure that I heard it correctly. You're saying be present. Go slow. Be supportive just by simply asking, "What can I do to help?" and being genuine about it. Take time for self-care and reflection. Give of your love generously.

Kevin Kowalke: Wonderful job Dr.

Dr Saadia: Those of the hacks for being a fantastic father. It's so simple the way you ... You've just kind of outlined it, made it so easy. One of the most difficult jobs on earth I would say is being a new father, and you just gave a hack and made it sound so simple. You're amazing. Thank you. Thank you so much for this.

Kevin Kowalke: Well, thank you and I really appreciate the kind words. I believe, and I did not live this for the majority of my life, but I would say for the last six to seven years when I had some of my own really significant personal breakthroughs about life is I realized that the more ... As simple as you can make anything in life, the better the outcome will ultimately be. I try to live that in all aspects of my life and I also believe that if I keep things very simple with regards to being a father and being a husband, and focus on what really, truly matters, that I believe I'll be successful. That's my goal every day is to be a great father, to be a great husband, and I sure hope that that's what's happening.

Dr Saadia: Well, my perspective, you're doing a fantastic job and my favorite thing, you get a gold star Kevin.

Kevin Kowalke: Aw, thanks.

Dr Saadia: You're most welcome. Thank you.

Kevin Kowalke: You're welcome. Thanks for having me.

Dr Saadia: It was an absolute pleasure. This is really good.

Kevin Kowalke: Anytime that you want to talk about fatherhood, anything like that, I'd be willing to share because hopefully the message would bring well to your audience.

Dr Saadia: Yes. Thank you. Everyone listening out there, please make sure you do listen to this not just once, twice, because there's a chock-full of information, wealth of wisdom. Kevin is just amazing and if you have met his daughter, you already know what an amazing father he is. If you've met Julie, you know what an amazing mother Julia is. This is definitely a family to watch and see how Miss Addison grows up for all the good hacks. We all need hacks and these are great hacks. Go out there and listen to this and pause it, listen to it again, because there is a lot of wealth of information that Kevin just shared with all of us. Thank you Kevin.

Kevin Kowalke: You're welcome. Thank you Dr.